Monday, January 23, 2012

Alright people, This isn't reality tv, this is just reality,

I work in a scrap yard. It's a small yard, about the size of a Burger King and is not walled in by stacks of cars. In that it's not very cinematic, but it pays my bills. We're situated near the city landfill/recycling center, which is a boon as people are often angry at the concept of paying to get rid of their trash. How odd and unprecedented. After 7 months working there, I realized that it was a shame not to share the enigmatic and esoteric items that get tossed regularly by passers-by looking to save a few bucks, as we take any metal items off their hands for free.
Ok, so basically we're the non-disgusting version of "the dump." We don't take trash, we take tools, appliances, bed frames, random cuttings of steel from metal shops, rusty yard decor, saw blades, signs, hubcaps, dinette sets, chairs, sheet steel, sinks, window frames, car parts, engines, lamps, cables, piping, knives, gutters, shelves, lockers, file cabinets, pots and pans, and an unending supply of workout equipment that cracks me the hell up.

Who is still paying retail for Nordic Traks, AbLounges and Soloflexes? My getting them out of truck beds and trailers is the most exercise they've ever caused.

This place is like a flea market to the nth degree. While the above listed items are the norm, the abnorm are the fun additions to the list. I will attempt to list a new odd items per day, but don't be shocked when the hum-drums reign supreme on some days. I will also dip into the past here and there when the drums hit the business, but for now let's start with today.
One of those treadmills with the shifting altitude steps came in. It was heavy, and ridiculously expensive once upon a time. From the dust on it, I imagine it was one impressive-looking low shelf. The men seemed certain he was doing me a favor by dumping a heavy item on me instead of paying for disposal. Normal.
While I could go on at great length about people's inability to understand "9-5, everyday" and "yes, we're open," it's a little Clerks, for me. I'd rather go one about stupidity based more specifically on the business. There's plenty.
To contrast the pitfalls, the perks are excellent when they pop up. I get to keep anything awesome that drops by. Do you hear what's I'm typing? ANYTHING that finds its little old way into the yard. Now I realize that as close as I may seem to a garbage man, this is not really true. It's a whole other level; think of a clerk in an antique or random junk shop full of working, barely working or non-functioning items. That's me, except I'm not paying to get this stuff. The shop analogy holds most true where I spend the bulk of hours: disassembling items. I take apart, rip apart, and smash metal objects to separate metals from other metals...smash metal to remove non-metals. Sort, sort, sort. Why? Gotta sell the stuff! Can't just gather it for the fun, the boss sells the stuff to people that want it. I don't care why they want it, they're paying for it. There are bits of basic aluminum, extruded aluminum, stainless steel, regular steel, cast alum, aluminum with steel screws that are too much work to pull out, and the useless plastics and glass built into products all over the yard. It's an industrial and commercial slaughterhouse. But I take home some awesome stuff. Next time.

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